Boundaries in Relationships

听完（或读完）整段再答

新同事第一天问了 Lamia 哪几个问题？她当时是怎么反应的？

xīn tóng shì dì yī tiān wèn le Lamia nǎ jǐ gè wèn tí tā dāng shí shì zěn me fǎn yìng de

What did the new colleague ask Lamia on day one, and how did she react?

听完（或读完）整段再答

东东为什么说「这说明人家把你当自己人了」？

dōng dong wèi shén me shuō zhè shuō míng rén jiā bǎ nǐ dāng zì jǐ rén le

Why does Dongdong say the colleague was treating her as one of their own?

听完（或读完）整段再答

「不问才叫见外」是什么意思？东东觉得现在还是这样吗？

bú wèn cái jiào jiàn wài shì shén me yì si dōng dong jué de xiàn zài hái shì zhè yàng ma

What does 不问才叫见外 mean, and does Dongdong think it still holds?

听完（或读完）整段再答

Lamia 昨天差点做了什么？东东为什么说「幸好没按」？

Lamia zuó tiān chà diǎn zuò le shén me dōng dong wèi shén me shuō xìng hǎo méi àn

What did Lamia almost do, and why is Dongdong glad she did not?

听完（或读完）整段再答

东东为什么把「一刀切」比作鸵鸟把头埋进沙子里？

dōng dong wèi shén me bǎ yì dāo qiè bǐ zuò tuó niǎo bǎ tóu mái jìn shā zi lǐ

Why does Dongdong compare 一刀切 to an ostrich burying its head?

听完（或读完）整段再答

东东说说话之前要「铺垫一下」。Lamia 后来是怎么委婉地说的？

dōng dong shuō shuo huà zhī qián yào pū diàn yí xià Lamia hòu lái shì zěn me wěi wǎn de shuō de

Dongdong says to lay some groundwork first. How did Lamia put it in the end?

他这个人特别有____，从来不打听别人的私事。

tā zhè ge rén tè bié yǒu ____，cóng lái bù dǎ tīng bié rén de sī shì。

He has a real sense of boundaries — he never pries into anyone's private business.

开玩笑要有____，过了就不好笑了，只剩尴尬。

kāi wán xiào yào yǒu ____，guò le jiù bù hǎo xiào le，zhī shèng gān gà。

A joke needs a sense of measure; past a point it stops being funny and is just awkward.

我不是想____你，只是想问清楚这件事。

wǒ bú shì xiǎng ____ nǐ，zhǐ shì xiǎng wèn qīng chu zhè jiàn shì。

I don't mean to overstep — I just want to get this clear.

如果告诉朋友他有口臭，他和我可能都会觉得很____。

rú guǒ gào su péng you tā yǒu kǒu chòu，tā hé wǒ kě néng dōu huì jué de hěn ____。

If I tell a friend he has bad breath, both of us are probably going to feel awkward.

他没直说，只是____地提醒我说：你可以再看看你今天衣服裤子穿好没有。

tā méi zhí shuō，zhǐ shì ____ dì tí xǐng wǒ shuō：nǐ kě yǐ zài kàn kan nǐ jīn tiān yī fu kù zi chuān hǎo méi yǒu。

He didn't say it outright — he hinted tactfully: you might want to check how you're dressed today.

最能看出一个人的界限感的，是他____别人时的态度。

zuì néng kàn chū yí gè rén de jiè xiàn gǎn de，shì tā ____ bié rén shí de tài dù。

Nothing shows a person's sense of boundaries better than how they say no.

我想再加一根吸管，不是____你，是我自己的习惯。

wǒ xiǎng zài jiā yì gēn xī guǎn，bú shì ____ nǐ，shì wǒ zì jǐ de xí guàn。

I'd like a second straw — it isn't that I find you off-putting, it's just my own habit.

他一句话不说就翻我的手机，这是____我的隐私。

tā yí jù huà bù shuō jiù fān wǒ de shǒu jī，zhè shì ____ wǒ de yǐn sī。

He went through my phone without a word — that's an intrusion on my privacy.

我提醒你不是因为嫌弃你，而是不希望你在别人面前____。

wǒ tí xǐng nǐ bú shì yīn wèi xián qì nǐ，ér shì bù xī wàng nǐ zài bié rén miàn qián ____。

I'm telling you not because I'm put off, but because I don't want you embarrassed in front of others.

他当着大家的面直接说了出来，虽然他这样说让当时的我很没____，可我到现在还很感谢他。

tā dāng zhe dà jiā de miàn zhí jiē shuō le chū lai，suī rán tā zhè yàng shuō ràng dāng shí de wǒ hěn méi ____，kě wǒ dào xiàn zài hái hěn gǎn xiè tā。

He said it right in front of everyone. It cost me face at the time, but I'm still grateful to him.

没有前面的____直接就问，听起来就变味了。

méi yǒu qián miàn de ____ zhí jiē jiù wèn，tīng qǐ lai jiù biàn wèi le。

Asking straight out, with no groundwork laid first, comes out sounding wrong.

他为了不____人，别人的什么要求他都会答应，最后累坏了自己。

tā wèi le bù ____ rén，bié rén de shén me yāo qiú tā dōu huì dā ying，zuì hòu lèi huài le zì jǐ。

To avoid getting on anyone's bad side he agrees to every request, and wears himself out.

配得感不高的人觉得寻求别人的帮助是在____别人。

pèi de gǎn bù gāo de rén jué de xún qiú bié rén de bāng zhù shì zài ____ bié rén。

People low on self-worth feel that asking for help is bothering someone.

越____的关系，越容易忘了对方也需要空间。

yuè ____ de guān xi，yuè róng yì wàng le duì fāng yě xū yào kōng jiān。

The closer the relationship, the easier it is to forget the other person needs space too.

我顶多是删除，____太决绝了，我做不到。

wǒ dǐng duō shì shān chú，____ tài jué jué le，wǒ zuò bú dào。

At most I'd delete someone. Blocking is too final — I couldn't do it.

处理不了复杂的关系，我们就容易____。

chǔ lǐ bù liǎo fù zá de guān xi，wǒ men jiù róng yì ____。

When a relationship is too complicated to handle, we reach for the blunt, one-size-fits-all fix.

看图配词：课件里的插画

先点图片，再选对应的词。选错了？点那张图，再选一次。全部配对就完成。

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从词库里选词填空（老师课件原题）

点一个词填入下一句空格，点已填的句子可以清掉。每个词只用一次。

1. 1他开玩笑很有____，从来不会让人下不来台。
2. 2我不是____你，只是我自己习惯用另一根吸管。
3. 3每个人情况都不一样，公司规定不能这样____。
4. 4他没直说，只是____地提醒我衣领翻起来了。
5. 5为了不____领导，他把不是自己的活儿也接了下来。
6. 6没有前面的____直接就问，听着就像在挑毛病。
7. 7他一句话不说就翻我的手机，这已经____到我了。

____把他拉黑，不如告诉他你的界限在哪里。

____ bǎ tā lā hēi，bù rú gào su tā nǐ de jiè xiàn zài nǎ lǐ。

Rather than blocking him, tell him where your line is.

与其一直猜他会不会生气，____直接问一句他介不介意。

yǔ qí yī zhí cāi tā huì bu huì shēng qì，____ zhí jiē wèn yí jù tā jiè bu jiè yì。

Rather than guessing whether he is angry, just ask him outright.

在不伤害别人____，也要学会保护自己的界限。

zài bù shāng hài bié rén ____，yě yào xué huì bǎo hù zì jǐ de jiè xiàn。

So long as you are not hurting anyone, learn to protect your own line too.

在当事人同意的____，我们才能把这件事告诉别人。

zài dāng shì rén tóng yì de ____，wǒ men cái néng bǎ zhè jiàn shì gào su bié rén。

Only with the person's consent may we tell anyone else.

Rather than blocking him, tell him where your line is.

按顺序点选词块，拼完自动判分。点已选的可以撤回。

So long as you are not hurting anyone, learn to protect your own line too.

按顺序点选词块，拼完自动判分。点已选的可以撤回。

他总____我的私事，让我觉得被冒犯了。

He is always digging into my private business — it felt like an intrusion.

这要看具体情况，不能____。

It depends on the case — you cannot handle them all the same blunt way.

我不太想去，又担心拒绝了会____他。

I would rather not go, but I am worried that refusing would put him off me.

He is the kind of friend who walks in without knocking.

按顺序点选词块，拼完自动判分。点已选的可以撤回。

What I can least stand is the kind of relative who asks about everything.

按顺序点选词块，拼完自动判分。点已选的可以撤回。

我不喜欢那种____的人。

I do not like the kind of person who asks about everything.